Toddler Years

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Sometimes I just want out!

I can’t really pinpoint when I started suspecting that something wasn’t quite right with my boy. As all parents know, toddlers are active , learning about themselves and the world around them.

Yes, Drew, my son was very, very active. I thought this was a normal state of being with a son. I was young myself and my mother wasn’t much help in guiding me. I have a brother who’s as laid back as a cat sunning itself at a window, so, Mom, couldn’t or wouldn’t relate to what I was going through with my Tasmanian devil.

It’d be safe to say that Drew wasn’t a toddler, he was a runner. Walking or taking his time to get from point A to point B wasn’t in his vocabulary or should I say his character.

He would take off as if some boogie-man was chasing him. I’m not talking sometimes, I’m saying he did this ALL the time. As soon as his tiny feet hit the floor he was off and running at break-neck speed.

We lived in a couple of two-story homes. Steps were dangerous for me and Drew. No matter how many times I’d grab his hand to teach him how to go down the steps, he’d wind up doing it his way which, usually meant, that he’d fall or I’d fall or we’d both go tumbling down at the same time.

Drew was a noisy child/toddler/baby and is still a very noisy adult. As a toddler he had this high pitched scream that could shatter glass. Ella Fitzgerald would be envious of his pitch.

People would look at me as if they’re wondering, what did I do or what am I doing to this child. I didn’t do anything but try to teach him and God knows I love[d] him.

I’m talking about twenty-three years ago. Back then, spanking wasn’t a second thought. We didn’t have to worry about Child Protective Services knocking at our door because we spanked our children. So, yes, I spanked my son until I realized that the spankings were doing no good.

I believe[d] in the three strike rule, yes, just like baseball. I would tell my son no, then try and distract him from what was getting him into trouble. Low and behold, he’d go right back to what I told him not to do.

As a toddler, the three strikes didn’t work well. I’d have to give him nine or more because I wouldn’t want to spank him and time-outs were out of the question.

Believe it or not, shiny objects kept his attention. Or anything that made loud noises would distract him enough to keep him out of trouble for a little while.

Still, I didn’t suspect that anything was wrong with Drew. I thought that his actions were normal for a son. I’m from the old school, my Dad always told me to let boys be boys.

He’d say “Debbie, boys get into things, they pull wings off flies and bees and pull little girls hair. Let him be a boy, that’s what he is”

Well, that thought stuck for a while until my little boy would start breaking away from me.

One day, we went to Acmes on Market street in Akron. I always kept him in the cart because I’m not a masochist, no, I’m not, really I’m not.

When we got done shopping and headed out to the car, Drew made his break. I had to leave my cart in the middle of the parking lot to chase him, he and this semi-truck were headed for a collision. My thought: the semi is gonna win!

Yet, still, I didn’t suspect anything. Drew was about four or five at this time. I began wondering what was wrong with my son when, he ran head on into a brick wall. It’s not that he didn’t see the wall, it’s that Drew seemed to think that the wall was going to move because he wanted it to.

Now, THAT is what made me start to wonder.

More to come…

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One Response

  1. my son is two and a half he is very disruptive and destroys eveything he is so demanding requires so much attentions he hates other children constantly spits he is so cruel to animals he has wrecked my house he loves anything that lights up anything that is shinny he is on the go constantly he will no go to bed unless i am with him he loves the bath and loves been in the car but he is driving my family apart the rest of my kids hate him i live him but hate him aswell i do not go out as it is a nightmare with him sitting in a cafe he climbs spits bangs etc he also bangs his head of the floor just about lost his big toe did’nt seem much fussy.
    the other kids try so hard he just punches spits and scratches there face my other son has so much marks on his wee face i feel so guilty as its jude that has done it.
    when i go shopping my husband sits in the car with him cause if we went into asdas he goes about spitting knocking everything of the shelves etc out of 7 days a week i go out once to asdas (eg wall mart) my husband stays in the car with jude as i take the other 4 with me as going into a place like that he is a nightmare.
    He loves to climb he needs constant supervision in the garden as our fence is 5ft and he still climbs over it.
    i cry all the time as i love him so much and feel that i cannot reach him no matter what i do my other 4 kids are not getting the attention they need as my time is took up with jude .When i look into his eyes it is like looking into the eyes of a shark dark deep lifeless like he’s somewhere else .
    Where can i get help ??

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